Why Purpose Needs A Burn

SPEAKER_01 0:12

Welcome back to another episode of The Burn. I am Ben Newman, and you know how we do this every single week. We're gonna bring you a story of an athlete, an entertainer, a celebrity, a business owner, somebody who has helped us understand that why and purpose is not enough. There's an underlying burn that ignites your why and purpose and causes you to show up on the days you don't feel like it, and especially after you win. Today's guest is an incredibly special guest. He is a dear friend, John Chirondo, and he is somebody who inspires me. I get better in conversations that we have together. He is a no-holds barred New Yorker who's gonna tell you the way that it is, so you know you're gonna get better. I promise you guys are gonna get better listening. But he is an extraordinary entrepreneur, family man, philanthropist. But the thing I think you're gonna enjoy the most is every week you hear me say, it's about showing, not just not just when you win, but when you don't feel like it. John is a guy who shows up when he doesn't feel like it. And we're gonna get deep into his burn, his fire, and his passion. You're gonna realize he's showing up more than he ever has during really challenging times. But he's also somebody who embodies for me every time I say, How do you show up after you win? He's somebody who's had enough success in his life he could have stopped a long time ago. But it's about pouring into others, helping others grow and the challenge of being successful and winning. So, my dear friend John Chirondo, welcome to the burn.

SPEAKER_00 1:49

Absolute a privilege and a pleasure, Ben. I uh like this is like a bucket listing for me. I see the podcast on like one day I'm gonna get there, one day. So we're able to finally put it together. So I'm super happy to be here. Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_01 2:03

Well, I I appreciate you continuing to have me in your life, whether it be, you know, enjoying a Super Bowl invitation when the Tampa Bay Bucks won to a Tampa Bay Bucks game in your suite, to opportunities to spend time with your organization, or just spend time having lunch in your office. The interactions are always special. And I know these types of interviews are something that you have done, you don't do a lot of, but I appreciate you taking the time to do this as busy as you are because there's so much value that you can bring to everybody listening. Um, I'd really like

Nina’s Cancer Journey And Faith

SPEAKER_01 2:35

to just have the real conversation and just get deep fast because that's how you and I always chat and discuss things. You're currently still right in the middle of one of the toughest periods of time in your life. Um and and I'd love to just dedicate our time together today to your daughter Nina. And I'd love for you to just share um how your fire is brighter than it's ever been, uh, and how you've always faced adversity, but how you're facing this current adversity that you're in.

SPEAKER_00 3:08

Yeah, um adversity is always something that entrepreneurs talk about, and we you know, we go through things, and I I've always had this perspective that this too shall pass applies to the good and the bad. So just stay kind of neutral through it all, appreciate the good, really appreciate the bad, because that's where we get our biggest strengths from through adversity and tough times. And I think we grow as people and as leaders. But over the last three years, you know, my my daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer um right after she got married to a great guy. Um, and I I had to resign my faith that God would lead me in the direction and her in the direction that my prayers would take me. And we had yourself included, of course, and and so much outpouring and so much love that we received over the three years that I sat down one day and I just said to God, I I believe in the prayers. And it came to me that if I believe I have to believe in the plan even if I don't like the outcome. And that sounded really good for three years because you know, things were moving. She had breast cancer, she beat it with the out the utmost grace of any human being I've ever been around. Um the breast cancer was gone, three days of respite, of peace in her life. She got severe headaches, you wound up with brain cancer, massive tumors in her brain. Um we immediately, you know, got the best doctors in the world, went up to slum kettering in New York City. She had massive brain surgery. 3,000 surgeries. The guy who the surgeon performed prior to her, he's never seen someone leave the hospital after that surgery after two days. She just didn't like hospitals. She was like, I'm leaving. She was she got out of that. And over a course of about 18 months, you know, the first the first visits with the doctor was like, Hey, don't have a lot of optimism. You know, this is a you know, you're probably looking at two to four months at best. And those are hard words to chew on. That's like chewing on glass, um and swallowing it. But I they didn't know her. Um she beat brain cancer, right? The brain cancer, she beat it. Every time it showed up, she beat it. Every time it got smaller, she was being going in the right direction, and then she started having issues with her legs, and they just thought it might have been all the chemo and all the medicine, and ultimately they came to the conclusion that it was leptomeningeal disease, which is a horrific, horrific form of cancer that it metastasized from her brain into her spinal cord and becomes like a dust where it starts to coagulate and clog up in her spinal fluid, and you start to lose motor skills. Arms, legs, verbal. Needless to say, it is a horrific um thing to watch uh your daughter go through. Horrible. And she did it with grace and beauty and courage, and you know, it it was amazing how strong she was, and she's the only girl in the family, right? So, you know, we had like eight guys surrounding her at all times. She had like this entourage of men around her, and and some real tough alpha men around her, and she was the toughest of all of us. She was tougher than every one of us. And uh last November, it's uh you know, you're a big college football guy, so you'll appreciate this. Last November, her and her husband's uh routine was they would watch Notre Dame games together, and we knew that you know the end was near. And I looked at my son-in-law and I said, It's not gonna be today because she won't ruin the tradition. She'll watch Notre Dame with you. And she watched a Notre Game game, Notre Dame won. The next day was the 10th, it was a Sunday, and the 11th was uh Veterans Day, which is a tough day for my son-in-law. He's a highly decorated um army ranger, served eight years defending this country. Um, and I said to him, It's not gonna be tomorrow. She won't do that on Veterans Day. And then on the 10th, she passed. And you know, where is Monday? And we have given off all of employees to every company everywhere in the world that we have offices, and we don't have that many offices around probably six countries that Monday you have a day off, and it's called Be the Good Day, and we're imploring everyone to do something good, do something that she's done, but her whole life was about service. So how come every time I see you I cry? Um the uh the the premise behind that is even if you don't do something for the community, do something for your family, do something for yourself, right? She loved taking care of people to this day. Her homeless drive still continues where we feed and clothe the homeless once a year. Um she loved dogs, sometimes more than people, I think. We're just telling people to go out and we're gonna go out and uh we're gonna go to some people's homes and feed some people who need food and deliver some groceries as a family. And I know a lot of people in the companies have all planned some stuff, and we'll share those things on Tuesday. And hopefully Monday will be a better day for some people in the world, and it'll be a good day for all of us. Um my son, whose hair is literally like the exact opposite of mine, he is shaving his head on Monday and donating his hair to a young lady with cancer. So you know hard to keep going because you know, I wake up some days and I think, man, she's just gonna call me. She's there'll be times where I'll grab my phone and I'll go to text her or question. So it's tough, you know. I live in that that phase of denial of grief, you know, it doesn't it doesn't go away. And I read somewhere that, you know, you when you lose someone, and you know this, Ben, you don't lose them once, you lose them over and over and over again. But there's a purpose behind this, right? You know that the burn is is there and you know I I don't have to work, I've been blessed with having great people around me and some some good decisions that I made, but I'm back ever stronger than ever, reinvigorated more than ever, working not only harder but a bit more creative than ever. I promised that I would write her doctor a check for fifty million dollars and we're gonna cure this thing. And I don't break promises, and I sure ain't gonna break one to my daughter. She's not gonna have to go through that in vain.

SPEAKER_01 10:08

I um we got to know each other fast from the moment that we were first introduced, and uh the bond continues to get stronger, and you know, the bond of loss is is very powerful. Um, me losing my mom, you losing your daughter, um, far different, bar both far incredibly painful. I I've never

Be The Good Day And Service

SPEAKER_01 10:35

seen you focused like this. And uh I was always inspired in all our conversations. I'm like, how does this guy do all this with all these businesses? And it's just uh amazing how you've leaned into the pain, doesn't make it easy. Um, I've actually never heard it the way that you just shared it to say that you actually live the death over and over. I mean, there's mornings I wake up, I I cry as if my mom just passed away yesterday and it's been, you know, darn near 40 years ago. Um, and I I've never heard it expressed that way. But I just think for everybody listening, you know, like these are the real conversations. You know, when when when times are really hard, this is why you become intentional in your life so you can be where you want to be, do what you want to do. The the number of times I would call you or text you to check on Nina, I mean, over the course of that year, you you were with her more than you were almost doing anything else. And your businesses are still there. It wasn't about the business. You worked hard in business to make sure that you could always be where you wanted to be when you wanted to be. That's a powerful lesson. What can you share about that for people who get so caught up in the small things that are meaningless rather than working really hard to know that you have your freedom when it really matters?

SPEAKER_00 11:46

Yeah, it's uh I get asked the question a lot, you know, should I start my own business because I want the freedom to do what I want? Like, well, you're better off taking your money, get go buy Alcatraz, lock yourself in that prison, and you know, be the be the warden, the prisoner, and the gatekeeper of your because there is no freedom in the beginning. There is truly no freedom. And and for most guys and girls, women, men, they don't experience freedom because they're nobody can do it better than me. So I'm gonna do everything type mindset. And and that just restricts a business from ever expanding beyond the individual. And I was there at one point in time. But for the most part, Ben, I took three years off and my business didn't skip a beat. Um I and and and I and I and I kind of go back to the philosophy of number one, I have the most amazing people in the world that work with me, that allow me to live a life that when I was on welfare and my oldest son was born on welfare and food stamps that I could never have imagined. Right from from not just a monetary point of view, but for giving back, right? From the ability to give back what I've been in, I've given back more money in a day that my parents made in their lifetime. And that's not to, I'm not putting that out there to brag. I'm just saying that's what's possible when you do things the right way and you do them with the right purpose. My purpose prior to this was to make as much money as I possibly can and to be a good steward of that money that God blessed me with so that I can do great things and wonderful things for people. And yes, I want to enjoy the ride along the way as well. Um, and I have amazing people. And, you know, I attribute all of our success to the individuals in these companies and the and and the people that I have around me. And when I had to take, when I decided when I wanted to, when I was needed to just step away for three years, companies are missing because I poured into them for decades. I have people working for me for 30 with me for 30 plus years. Um, but I also made a point about 20 years ago that I would hire people that have been to the places I want to go. And you know, my first attorney that I hired in-house, he's like, hey man, I have three billion dollars in MA experience. You're a hundred million dollar company. What are you gonna do with me? I said, be patient, be patient. I'm gonna grow into you. You're gonna help me go where I want to go. A year later, I did a nine-figure acquisition. He wrote the acquisition, he did the asset purchase agreement, he represented me in court through the bankruptcy proceedings. He probably saved me $400,000 just being on board. Shortcuts, the ability to say, hey, I've done this before, I've seen these templates. You know, when I hired my first CFO, he was from a publicly traded company. He's like, What are you gonna do with me? I said, just be patient, I'll grow into you. They've been to where I want to go. I knew where I wanted to go, I just didn't know how to get there. So what do I do? I hire people who've been there. They take me there quickly, they take me there safely, they

The Truth About Entrepreneur Freedom

SPEAKER_00 14:45

take me there not only so that we can get there quickly and safely, but they also teach me along the way. So I learn from everybody. So I try to hire people way above my pay grade, way above the company's pay grade, so that I have the best of the best leading the way to the place that I want to go. And I've always said if we're in my conference room and I'm the smartest guy in the conference room, it's one of two things: either we're alone or we're in the wrong conference room.

SPEAKER_01 15:14

Yeah. Speaking of conference rooms and what you're sharing, because this speaks to the level of intentionality, and that's now the level of intentionality I see, and the focus and the energy and the fire. It's gonna be incredible the impact you have on the world, not just from business, but philanthropy and literally the money that's gonna put an end to what took Nina's life. I remember being in your conference room the first time that you showed it to me, and the level of intentionality, a couple of things. You've created an environment that's conducive for people to understand and be reminded of what it looks like to win, right? Very intentional. Like when you look on the wall, I want you to understand, feel, and see what winning looks like. But you've been very intentional to train your people, to put the right people in front of your people, to create curriculums inside of an organization that have nothing to do with what these people actually do for your companies, but to allow them to understand how great they can be to be better for your companies. So, that to me, I just want to tie this together because you're so humble about the way you do things. And I know you don't like taking credit for these things, but it takes a great leader to leave an organization for three years and you come back and you're still growing. You and I both know for me coaching a lot of business owners and you're doing a lot of business at a very, very, very, very, very, very high level. That that doesn't happen, John. That doesn't happen. That's taking care of your people, not just by money, not just by education for what they do for your organization, by taking care of people and helping them understand they can be great. Why have you done that at such an intentional level?

SPEAKER_00 16:58

Um, well, there's a few things that a lot of, you know, most things just hearken back to days when you were a kid. My dad once was forced to work on Christmas. I'm like, who, what kind of animal makes your dad work on Christmas? He's a construction worker. Who, what, what construction needs to be done on Christmas? So I was like, wow, you know, my dad was Superman to me in many ways, and other ways he was not, but how how much power did he not have under his own life that some guy made him work on Christmas? So that was one of the things. And there's I've been working since I'm 11 years old, and I've not not worked since I'm 11 years old. Um and I've only worked for someone for a few years, and it was horrible. I was just an asset, I was a tool, right? And I was treated as such, and I worked my ass off, and and I'm still treated like a tool. And I was like, man, I I don't I don't like this feeling, and I don't like my dad being treated that way. And ultimately, my mom was working in the in the workforce and she was treated that way. And I'm like, I I'm not gonna treat people that way, and I won't. I refuse to. And and most companies' mission statements say, Oh, it's like a family. This our mission statement clearly states we are a family. Doesn't mean that you can't have accountability, that you can't have confrontation or constructive confrontation or constructive criticisms. But the one thing that needed to happen was in the company is we needed to be honest. We needed integrity amongst each other. So when a CFO and a CMO or a CFO and a COO are at odds with each other, I don't want it to be territorial and I don't want it to be um personal. I want it to be transparent that the other party is speaking on what's best for the company, not the individual. And we were able to build that. You know, from 2020 to 2025, we've probably spent, well, we definitely spent millions of dollars on building the culture. But in 2020, I just I told every employee when no nobody's getting let go. There'll be no COVID. I don't even know what COVID was going to do. If this was February, that nobody's getting let go. We're not laying anybody off. I don't care what it costs me. And that year we sat down, and every single employee in the company spent hours every Tuesday. I let them build the company's mission statement. Because who better to get the mission statement from than the actual blood of the company, the people, the heartbeat. I can say what I think, but I can't inflict it on people to be effective. And I allowed them to create it, and it hangs everywhere in this building. It's everywhere, it's right outside my office. It's it's literally 40 feet in the air in the in the warehouses. It's everywhere, and that's what we we we live by.

SPEAKER_01 19:37

This level of intentionality shows up in every area of your life. Um, I I know that when I say this, it the naturalness is to fight me on it, but you are an example of it. I do believe that balance does exist. Now, when I say this, balance is not the exact same amount of time, but you have been very intentional to, I mean, absolutely work and create and be the example of what's possible. But you joked with me before we hit

Hiring Great People And Building Culture

SPEAKER_01 20:10

hit record to start the interview that you just said you would sign on to coach another one of your son's teams. And so, as much as I know you work hard, I do want people to hear how important family is to you. We could see that through the emotion in your eyes with your daughter and your eldest son, but with your two boys and with Claudia, how important is family for you?

SPEAKER_00 20:32

There's nothing more important. There's nothing. I I've I've literally been on food stamps, I've waited on cheese lines. I used to shop at night because I was so embarrassed to get my food stamps that my buddies would see me in in my neighborhood. Um, but I had my family, right? And and I had my health, they had their health. Um my wife I had cancer 13 years ago, breast cancer, double mastectomy. Um, I have when Joseph was born, he had some some issues. He, you know, Joseph has Down syndrome. Um we weren't able to have any other children. We were blessed to adopt Matthew at birth. And I I not that I don't care about anything else, but there really is no close second for me. I I don't I don't do anything that I do for Ferraris or private planes or that stuff. That's just like an ancillary benefit. It's cool, it looks good on the gram, right? It's good to motivate people to what's possible. But I I live and die for my family and and and and my extended family. I have a lot of them. And to to coach my children, to be around them, my entire schedule has always revolved around my children. But that doesn't mean I won't work 20 hours a day. It just means four of those hours might be the middle of the afternoon where I can go sit and watch my son try off on a high school football team while my daughter's. Ballet class or go to a parent teacher conference or be part of something that my sons are doing at school or be a baseball practice. I've been able to manage my time effectively that while there is no proportionate balance, those people that matter most to me don't know the difference. I ain't perfect because you'll see a lot of this. I shouldn't, right? When I shouldn't be doing that, but I'm a work in progress and I'll always be a work in progress. But I would rather coach little league than make a hundred million dollars. I really would. It's the only place in the world that I'm detached from all the bullshit. I'm detached from my phone. And I love it. And time goes by so fast. And and and my kids know that they have a dad that all I care about, my headstone. I just want one word on my headstone. Dad. I don't give a shit about anything else. I don't want to be in. If I can be the greatest dad that ever lived, to my to the people that matter most in that judgment, I have fulfilled my entire bucket list of life. And that's what I intend to do. And I told someone recently about my son cutting his hair, and they said, Man, you raised good kids. And I said, Man, I've been alive for 56 years. That's the nicest thing anybody's ever said to me. And if that is the last or the most nicest thing anybody ever says to me, I think I did a good job. And part of the, you know, Ben Nina was like, Nina was my right arm. She is my right arm. I dedicated my entire right arm to her, right? Um to survive that as well as I have. The first thing is there was never left anything unsaid between me and my daughter. Ever. Ever. Wednesday, um, I believe it is 6 at 12:31 and she said, I love you. And there's no regret. There's no regret. Yeah, do I think we could have done something more experimental? Should we have, yeah, I'll always second guess that. That's just my nature. But there was never anything left unsaid between us. She knew that she was she was the most powerful human being in my life because she's about the only person that I've ever listened to was her. I mean, from day one, she had me wrapped. You have a daughter, you know what it's like. You know, you can give your son, you can give your son the old hell

Family First And The Word Dad

SPEAKER_00 24:45

in the handbasket speech any time of the week. I yelled at my daughter one time, she's probably eight years old to clean her room. She started to cry. I said, Don't worry, I'll do it. That was where I realized the balance of power has completely shifted in this relationship, and I was okay. Um, and even at work, I know um there's a funny story. You were there with, you know, we had the event at my office, and she had literally stopped the middle of the event and told the guys, stop being a bunch of bitches. And I think Tim Grover was like, What? He's like, she didn't, she that's who she was. You knew where you stood with her, and her and I had an amazing relationship, and I look forward to seeing her again. But there was no regrets. I I and there will be no regrets. There'll be no death letter that you'll read after the fact, because if you're in my life, you know how I feel about you.

SPEAKER_01 25:32

Well, I I feel blessed uh to be in your life, and I feel blessed to have learned from you and how you've handled and responded to what you're currently going through, and we'll continue to go through together as friends. And um, for those that know John who are listening to this, you when I say how special he is, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Uh, for those of you that that have never had a chance to meet John, um, we're gonna get him out to more events and we're gonna get him to do more things and get him doing more of these types of opportunities. Because he he's just such a special human being. Um John, just thank thank you for being you and thank you for for how you show up in this world and the burn that you bring. Uh, I I do want to mention one thing. Uh John, you know, John has a myriad of companies, many of which you know, from Q1 to his guitar company to Once Upon a Coconut to Punched Energy. I mean, it's just a myriad, one after another after another. I'll just tell you, uh, I feel very blessed that uh there's some new exciting things that he's working on. Uh, it's actually gonna be announced at our boot camp. Uh, and and let me let me mention something about this. John is somebody who he does exactly what he says he's gonna do. And when he just said family's most important, it is. So there's gonna be an announcement of something very special that he and his organization are doing to really elevate so many amazing things that uh can be done for small and large businesses alike, entrepreneurs, people wanting to take it to the next level to hit this goal of finding that cure. But John was supposed to be live with us in Texas. Now we're getting a recording, but I'm like, bring on the recording because he's gonna be overseas honoring a commitment with his boys. So he's a man who does what he says he's gonna do. And if there's anything that you've gained from hearing John and the wisdom that he imparts, uh, just do what you say you're gonna do and show up in life with authenticity and make the most important people most important in your company, in your home, and how you show up in everything that you do. Uh, John, any any final thoughts uh from you?

SPEAKER_00 27:43

I do, because you're not getting off the hook that easy. First thing is on my desk for 20 years, I actually have it on my desk. It clearly states do what you say you would do, when you say you would do it, the way you said you would do it, regardless of the cost. Regardless of the cost, parts of the hard line for all of us. So, yeah, I I try to I try my best to do that as a business. I think that's part of why we've been successful, regardless of the cost, we do what we say we're gonna do. But I just want to say that a few things that I've learned from you that have been impactful, not only as a man, but as a businessman, was one is that never again

Do What You Say You’ll Do

SPEAKER_00 28:20

list. Right? The that I have that list, I have it, I have it next to me, it's in my draw, and sometimes I have to review it and look at it to remember what the shit in the world that I won't put up with, that I won't tolerate. And you helped me get to that list. But the most important thing, and and truthfully, one of the reasons why I think I'm adapting to the world after November 10th was at my daughter's funeral, you took a plane, you took your private plane from one event, you were headed to another event, and you made it a point to come to my daughter's funeral. And that alone would have been appreciated. Um but you didn't come to come to my daughter's funeral, you came to give me a message, probably the most impactful message that I've ever received in my life. And you came me a message that said, I watched my grandmother turn not positive but negative in the world after her daughter died, your mom. And you said, Don't let this do that to you. The world needs you. There have been many a dark days, man. Many a dark days. And there are people in the world who need me. And that message there hasn't been a day that that message hasn't resonated with me. So I love you for that. You know, there are a million whatever they're called, coaches out there. There's only a couple that are real, and you're definitely on the top of that list, and you've deserved all the accolades. There's a reason why world champions come to you. Um, and I'm honored to know you, to be able to pick up the phone and talk to you. Your wisdom, your passion is unparalleled. But your heart, that'll that that one thing you did right there for me, I could never forget that, and I'll never be able to repay. So thank you for that.

SPEAKER_01 30:21

Thank you, John. I uh before we both uh wind up a mess, I'm just gonna say I love you. And uh I I I look forward to being in this fight with you to to find this cure, uh, to honor Nina in the greatest way. Uh and I just I I just once again I I love you. Thank you for those words. And this has been the burn, and we'll see you next week. There's nothing else I can say.