Love Of The Game And Identity

SPEAKER_03 0:12

What was the burn, that fire inside of you that fueled the intentional focus and work ethic to take the game of football as high as you did?

SPEAKER_00 0:20

Well, two things come to mind, Ben. Number one was my love for the game. That sounds a little cliche, but my love for the game from the time I was a child, you know, just picking up a ball and feeling that ball in my hand and, you know, getting it to the destinated or the destination in terms of the receiver and just having fun with the game. Um, that was huge for me. But on a deeper level, the burn for me throughout the 16 years that I played competitively was it was for better or for worse, and this is what I write about, and this is what I want to help people with now. It was my identity. It's where I got my sense of purpose, it's where I got my fulfillment, it's where I got my confidence from, not just from inside, but that was being reinforced to me for all those years. So it became who I was, and I would learn many years later that actually that's not true for athletes, and it certainly wasn't true for me, and I've had to go about doing the important work of figuring out who I am as a human being beyond my identity as an athlete. But that fire came from the love of the game, the love to compete, the love of not doing it by myself, but sharing in the highs and lows with my teammates, and then also the pride that I felt in not just being an athlete, but in being a quarterback, which means something really special to me.

SPEAKER_03 1:37

So talk to us. You walk into Spartan Stadium. Literally, I mean, those years for Spartan football, you and Coach Saban, you put the program back on the map, right? I mean, there were some dormant, dormant years where fans were very upset. You guys get us back on the map. What's it like to walk into Spartan Stadium or to walk in these stadiums? You got a hundred thousand people? Because I think it's important for me when your identity is tied up in the roars of the fans, tell us what that's like and how you have to be careful with placing your identity or your value in those fans of 100,000 strong.

SPEAKER_00 2:15

Yeah, it's difficult, especially when you are done playing and that's no longer a part of your world, because the the lore of it is when you're an athlete, those 100,000 seat stadiums and the national television and the cameras that are in your face as you're practicing, or the reporters that are asking you questions, all this attention, that is your version of normal. And so you get so accustomed to that, and it really kind of deludes you. I mean, that's not a normal environment for anybody. And certainly once your career is over, it's impossible to duplicate that in many respects. There's no other job or no other place where you can go stand on a stage unless you're the Rolling Stones and perform in front of a hundred thousand people on a regular basis. There's just it there isn't. So to be able to deal with that and process all of that as a you know 18 to 22-year-old who doesn't even know themselves. I mean, you're basically a kid still, you've got all this adulation, you're experiencing incredible highs, and there's no feeling like going onto that type of a stage and excelling and coming out of that arena with a win. But of course, just as high as that high was, and I write this, uh write about this in the book as well, the very next week can be the worst day of your life, seemingly, at that moment, because you can walk out of there embarrassed and as a loser. So those huge swings are just they're magical, but you know, on any given Saturday, it could be tragic as well. So the ability to only handle the highs as you as you take them on, I think is just half the battle. You've got to be able to really realize who you are as a person to be able to develop the nervous system to be able to handle that environment because it's just not something that you're gonna be involved with or immersed in forever. It just can't be done.

SPEAKER_03 4:07

So, Bill, is there anything that you can share, you know, those depressing moments, those tough moments? Now it's an empty stadium, now the career's over. Maybe walk us through as hard as it is some of that self-talk and the things that you had to endure and how you found your strength to make it through those tough times that become dark for anybody that goes through these experiences.

Life After The Spotlight

FIRE Framework For Self Leadership

SPEAKER_00 4:28

Yeah, I mentioned it to you earlier before we started recording. But you know, when you're a big time athlete, people that you haven't spoken with or maybe don't even know come out of the woodwork because they want to just be attracted to you know what's going on. You know, they see you on TV or they've you know they know that you're you're winning some games and you've got some attention around you, and they want to feel that with you. They want to be a part of that. And then when that uh huge win goes away or the career ends, you know, some of those people that you thought were close to you and cared about you tend to fade away a little bit because there's nothing seemingly to be attracted to anymore. There's no career, there's no touchdown passes, there's no big wins on Saturdays. So that can be devastating because you start to think that you know people view you and your total worth in the world as just being related to that thing that you do, but it's just what you do, it's not who you are. So I think that's important for people to understand. And I laid out a framework in my book which spells out the acronym FIRE, which you're very familiar with. And F is for fierce knowledge, that's number one. You've got to understand who you are as a human being because that's what you were before you ever picked up a ball or stepped into this athletic arena. And most of us don't ever have to do that work because we are athletes from a very young age, and we continue to do that well into adulthood if we're lucky enough. But when that ends, here we are left with trying to pick up the pieces, and most of us don't even understand, number one, that we have to be aware of what that arena, what that athletic career gave us that filled us up so much that now we have to go on a crusade to go and find again and figure all that stuff out. And if you're left to do that on your own, man, that's a daunting task for anybody, especially like in my case, I spent 16 years, 16 years playing competitive football. I mean, that's just that's not one game a week, that's hours of practice, that's weight room, that's thinking, that's dreaming, that's watching my heroes and visualizing myself doing that. It's just complete immersion in that thing. And then when that's over after 16 years or whatever your number is, you lost. You're you you have a tendency to just drift and and not understand your place in the world, you know, and you might have thoughts of where do I belong now? Who and to be real, who is gonna love me now and why are they gonna love me? I mean, those are things that really have to be wrestled with. And for a lot of us, we don't have the nervous system or the internal strength. And a lot of us have family and friends that can help with that. But here's an important point that I really want everybody to understand. From my perspective, I don't is as close and as supportive as my parents were, I didn't feel like I could even talk to them about these things. Why? Not because they didn't love me, but because they fully did not understand the steps that I walked through for 16 years and now what it actually feels like. And nobody could understand, not even really my teammates to a degree, because I was the only one who had the name Bill Burke, who played the position of quarterback, who saw the world through my eyes, who had my experiences. So I had to kind of figure that out on my own, or at least I felt that way. And that might be a personality flaw with me, but man, my point is it can be a very, very, very lonely journey to try and pick up the pieces after such a huge change in your life. And so then take us through the rest of the word, fire. I is inspired intention. Once you figure out the knowledge, you've got to make some intentions, you've got to decide the type of person that you want to be and the type of human being that you want to be. R is relentless action, and then the E is epic focus. And the reason that I put those descriptors in front of those words, because knowledge, intention, action, and focus, those are pretty basic, boring words. Everybody hears that, right? But when you tie emotion to some of these things, it really stirs up the thing inside you, that fire that can light you up and springboard you to having victory outside of the arena eventually. I tell my kids, you've got to expect adversity. You've got to just be prepared for it because it's gonna be a lot easier to handle it if and when it does come, if you know that it's coming, instead of just hoping that everything is gonna go perfectly and then you're absolutely dejected when it doesn't. Yeah, I I think my last message would just be to for people, your listeners, former athletes, to understand that the work that you do on yourself, you can't even imagine the ripple effect that that's gonna have on every other part of your life, not just your career, not just your relationships, your kids, the people that don't even know you. So there's no more important work than you can do for yourself, but for those around you and for the world than the work that you do on yourself.

Sponsor Q Logics

SPEAKER_03 9:21

This episode of The Burn is brought to you by our dear friends and partners at Q Logics. Now, you know I don't co-sign things I don't believe in. And I believe in John Chiarando and the team at Q Logics. He's built multiple nine-figure businesses with real integrity, real character, the kind of guy you want in your corner. But here's what happened all that expertise, all that knowledge, it was just his. Locked in his head, his decisions, his team, you couldn't access it. So John created Q-Logics. He basically said, How do I make everything I've built available to people who actually need it? And here's what that looks like. Q-Logic helps you see the blind spots in your business, the gaps you don't even know you have, and you don't know what you don't know. They're your tour guide through that. Q-Logics helps you build systems that make your business work better, or they ask better questions so you're approaching it in the most effective way. And Q Logic has access to a network of businesses and resources that have real connections, real synergies that can accelerate with what you're building. If any of that resonates, then go to Qyphon Logics, L-O-G-I-X.com forward slash event. Fill out a form, their team will research your situation personally, and then they'll tell you straight. Can they actually tell? Thank you to our friends and partners at Q Logics to make sure you find out more about the Q Logics and your opportunity to win more with them today.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

But um, you know, growing up and uh you know, just developing and maturing and finally coming to the realization that, you know what, my past doesn't define me. Uh at the end of the day, there's a lot of learning lessons that came from that. And I can look at the situation, I can say, hey, poor me and cry about it, or I can say, Life didn't happen to me, it happened for me. This is actually a superpower. What it gave me is it gave me awareness, it gave me presence when we were stripped out of our father's house in a very good way because the situation very volatile, um, we landed in a burn. And uh that created a lot of awareness at a very young age to you know, realize that being a man of means, being a man of resources, being a man that I I'm proud of is the way better path than you know, going and following the path of my father. So, no, I didn't have a strong role model in my father in terms of what to look up to, but I realized I took a step back and I realized, you know what? I actually, you know, get was given a gift. I was given a gift of what not to be so I can reverse engineer my life and to be the man I want to become. Uh so that would be the way I've processed it. And it didn't happen overnight. It was a process, just like you know, winning is a process, as I've learned from one of the the greatest of all times that you've had a chance to work with, the GOAT Nick Sabin. But that really struck with me because the process is how you become successful. And for me, the growth, the maturity, that perspective has been a process.

Discipline And Moral Authority Leadership

SPEAKER_03 12:06

And I I think you provide such an amazing example for all of our listeners, because when I learn more about you and I learn more about your story, you're an action taker, you're a doer. You don't allow the adversity or challenge to hold you back. You want to try new things. I I remember a phone call after we met at Amber Lee Lago's event. We got to have a huge shout out to Amber Lee, just an amazing woman, leader, human being, just a wonderful, wonderful person. That's where we had the opportunity to meet in person for the first time. And after you you reached out, we have a phone call and you asked me a bunch of questions. And a lot of what I shared were just making sure that you didn't make the mistakes that I've made on my journey and hoping that uh some of the things that I've learned from some great mentors in my life were things that would resonate and help you. And you know, over the years I've gotten calls like this all the time, Bryce. But what was so meaningful for me was it was probably less than 10 days later, you went, you gave a speech and you send me this text message, and it was that same fire and energy. I could feel the fire and energy through the text message of how excited you were. You're like, I ditched the slides, I didn't do this, I allowed my words to paint my pain. And it just it like it made my day. Because, you know, for us as coaches, you're a coach just like I am. Oh, yeah. You know, as coaches, we want to share things that make a difference, but the student has to be ready to listen and to implement. And you've done that. And it was it, I just wanted to share that moment because it's rare before I talk about the leader that you are. It's rare that somebody who's had the success that you have had as a leader would even reach out and say, Hey, let me ask you a few questions, Ben. Maybe you can help me. And that said a lot about you as well.

SPEAKER_01 13:50

Oh man, well, I appreciate that. I thank you for that. And uh man, I'm attracted to success. And while I've been, you know, fortunate to have a storied career and have awesome business partners, I also know that leadership is about having a white men, white belt mentality. It's a skill set, and the journey is never done. We talked about this. You were just on my show about winning, it's a process and it's always about looking forward, and you can never less rest on your morals. So, you know, I'm smart enough to know that hey, there's a lot of things I don't know. And uh when we first met, you know, seeing you speak, uh, our stories are so similar. Um, they're not the same, but they they they rhyme, they have, you know, strong analogy to them. Uh the way you commanded the room, I could just tell a leader, uh, I'm a leader. And when I see a very strong leader who has presence and who has care and compassion, it just really spoke to me. And I was just extremely uh impressed and blown away with your presentation. And I've come a long way in my speaking career. I still have a long way to go, but there were some things that I just really noticed that I wanted to lean in and get some feedback. And um, you know, I know what it's like to be on the uh giving end of coaching, and it's very frustrating when you give the knowledge and expertise and then the coaching isn't acted on it. So when you gave me some pointers, a couple of different adjustments that I just took and implemented in terms of my franchise system in terms of presentation, and I saw an immediate response, I just felt I had a duty, obligation, responsibility to do you a solid acknowledge you. So that's the foundation of that.

SPEAKER_03 15:14

I always like to say that you can only lead somebody to the level of discipline in which you live. And it's one of the things before we met when you first reached out, I I like to see, okay, the person who they say they are is that who they are. And for you being in the world, you're in the fitness space. You're either disciplined or you're not. There's plenty of people who own gyms who are 50 pounds overweight and they just love the business model of owning a gym. And I just I respected the voice of discipline that you spoke with and how you led. And then when I met you, I'm like, dude, this guy's in shape, he's got it together. Why is that so important to you as a leader, to be disciplined, to remain fit? Because you had enough success. You could you could put weight on, stop working out, and you're bit you'd still have a business, you'd still be growing.

SPEAKER_01 16:06

That would be the day the business starts to die, Ben. That would be the day. That's my mindset at least. As the leader, you need to be able to lead exit by example, more author, moral authority, uh, by John Um uh Maxwell, who is a uh mentor of leadership from afar. Um, and I learned these principles, I guess, you know, in in my youth, and I made many poor decisions in terms of leaderships and learning lessons. So I'm not saying I'm perfect, far from it. In fact, the opposite, a lot of the leadership qualities and characteristics I've been able to take with me is because of my learning lessons and my failures. Um, but what I've learned is that leadership is always the problem, it's always the solution, it's the most important thing in someone's life and success. And I have a leadership framework. My philosophy on leadership is uh adversity is your advantage. Take whatever happens to you, life happens for you, not to you. Okay. And take whatever it is and then make it better. There's some sort of gift that you can reframe, that you can take action, you can make a better situation. So that's my philosophy. But really, Ben, going back to your question to put a bow on it, um, there's three pillars of leadership that I follow. And uh the first is you need to be able to lead yourself, self-leadership. You can't lead anyone else unless you can lead yourself. Then when you lead yourself, you can lead your family. And then when you lead your family, you can lead your empire. And when you break down self-leadership, for me, it first starts with fitness. If I'm the CEO of international fitness franchise and I'm, you know, coaching and mentoring my franchise partners, my coaches, and my clients, and I don't look at the enact apart, I'm inauthentic and I'm not real. And then humbling myself, the best way that I've learned to lead is through moral authority, walking my own talk. And when you walk your own talk, then ultimately people follow. And that's been a secret to my success.

SPEAKER_03 17:50

That type of an improbable run, what were the things that you were talking about? What were the things that you were saying? What was it about your discipline, your burn, your fire, how you showed up that caused that team to rally to do something like that? I mean, that is one of the biggest upsets in the history of Illinois high school basketball.

SPEAKER_02 18:09

Yeah, you know, I I think when I when I look back at that, you know, it was with a group of guys that believed in one another, that spent a lot of time together. I remember going back, our point guard James Hahn uh has an ACL injury and he decides to delay his surgery because he wanted to go on spring break. And I remember being so ticked at him. I'm like, man, no, you we need you back as soon as possible because we're gonna go on this run for a state championship. You know, there's clips of when uh we lost the year before and me making the promise to people in our community that we were gonna get back to the state championship and win it. Um so all the blood, sweat, and tears, the relationships, those hard conversations, you know, our coach, uh Bob Williams, who's in the Hall of Fame, man, he was a tough guy to play for. Um but because of that, the discipline, the willing to get uncomfortable both in conversation and in the work that you put in, uh, it allowed you to stay focused when it got hard inside the games because for us the games were so much easier than our practices, were so much easier than the open gyms when we would have uh we get in fights in practice because we're competing against each other so hard. Um, and that allowed us to be prepared when it came to when the lights came on.

SPEAKER_03 19:26

That that's back in 2001. So up in uh Schaumburg, Illinois, that's a little bit of Michael Jordan and how he led uh rubbing off on you guys, battling in practice and uh getting into fights and attacking each other to bring out your best. But you know, oftentimes that's what it takes to win. It's that competitive spirit every single day.

Career Transition And Lost Status

Finding Purpose Beyond What You Do

SPEAKER_02 19:45

And for me, I've always wanted to be a part of winning cultures. I mean, it's why I have you as my coach, if you've won at a high level, you were in the financial industry. I want to I want to surround myself with people that have won. And Bruce Pearl uh had won a Division II uh championship and um got the Milwaukee job, and I was his first recruit at Milwaukee. There was no track record of him being successful in Milwaukee. I didn't even really know. I grew up in the Chicago area, an hour and a half away, no idea what UWM was or Milwaukee, never really heard of it. Um but he sold me on his championship pedigree and his passion, which he is incredible at, uh, great communicator, and uh so I I bought in and I want to be a part of it. Now you talk about seduction and success. You know, I I hope this isn't in uh empowering for other people. Yeah, I was really disciplined in high school. I I didn't, you know, I I didn't take a lot of time away from ball. I didn't get caught up in stuff. Um but when I went to college, you know, I did. And I was really disciplined when practice started. Uh I was really disciplined in the film room and in my workouts and my training, but I was not disciplined off the court. And my college career, although we won and I played and I was, you know, sixth, seventh man, um, I didn't have the college career that I believe I could have and should have. Because I was disciplined in some parts of my life, um, really disciplined in a lot of the areas that people would see me, right? Like in the classroom, I got good grades on the court. But at night, you know, or outside, I wasn't very disciplined. And it carried over into my ultimately my performance of what could have been with my career. Um, and so I did get seduced by success a little bit. Um, but you know, with Coach Perot and our relationship, he knew what was in me. Um, and that's often that's really why I believe he gave me the opportunity to come coach with him at the University of Tennessee after I did graduate and get done playing, because he knew the type of person I was and the discipline that was in me and um and and wanted me to be a part of his program here in Tennessee. Um at this time, Consul Martin had taken over. I'd I'd worked with him for uh uh two seasons. And I told Conzo, coach, I'm getting out. I'm done coaching. I said, I don't know what I'm gonna do yet, but I'm getting out. Um and uh that was hard, you know, because you you you you started with high school. And look, I don't like talking about high school, but the reality is, is my entire life. My dad played collegiate basketball, was really successful, my mom played college athletics. My entire life, you know, basketball is what our family was seen as. You know, that that was really what my identity was. Um, and so the thought of leaving in a town where I didn't really know anybody. I've been here seven years, but you know, when you're coaching, you know, you're you're sleeping in the arena sometimes, you're waking up early, you're getting home at night, like you don't have a life outside of the ball and outside of those relationships inside of the locker room. So deciding to leave, I didn't know what I was gonna do, man, and it was hard. Um you know, I I I thought about getting into real estate, I thought about getting into uh medical sales because my dad's family business was in medical sales, um, thought about getting in, staying in and around athletics. Um, but the Lord and and and two people, really Coach Pearl and my wife, really uh encouraged me to get into the financial planning services. I was a finance major, uh, but it was really hard because I tell people all the time, man, like I could call about anybody in town, and I'm not exaggerating when I say about anybody in town. We're a very successful SEC program. I could call about anybody in town when I was coaching and say, hey, Ben, business owner Ben, you know, president Ben, like what this is Mark Pancratz. I'm an assistant basketball coach at the University of Tennessee, man. I just had some time come up on my schedule to grab lunch. You want to go grab lunch tomorrow? 99% of people, if they're in town, they would have said yes. Now you get out, you go into the financial services industry, you talk about getting your teeth punched in every day. You got people that were friends, people, you know how it is, right? You thought you were close with, you call them, and it's all of a sudden like you got leprosy or something. Like they don't even want to talk to you. And and that, but my identity being in ball, like that's how people saw me. And it man, it was hard to have to go walk away from that. Um, and so I know what people are dealing with. Like, when your business isn't going well, you know, uh, do you get down? If if if you're done playing, I got professional, like when you're done playing, your identity's gone. Like, so much of us wrap our identity up in what we do or who we are and how much money we make. And if we do, I'm telling you, it's gonna be empty. You gotta find one of the faith or the other things that you can tie it to, that prize fighter day that you can tie your identity to that, because that's only what's gonna that that's not gonna change. That's not going nowhere. And and I just encourage people, um, you can't do it alone. Uh, and and you need people around you. You need people that maybe their fight's a little bit different, but they're fighting to to grow and fighting to be better, and and and it is, it can be lonely when you're fighting to do things that are different and to stand out for the right ways. Um, but man, do our do our kids need people to stand up for them? Does our country need people that are willing to stand up and be different? Do our businesses do our yes, everybody. And it takes courage, um, it takes getting uncomfortable. But now more than ever, do people need uh those that are willing to stand up and get uncomfortable for the right things? And I just encourage people that um to to stand up and do it. And because there's there's people that are watching, even if they don't say something to you, um, you can be having that impact just by the way that you show up every day.

Final Reflection And Encouragement

SPEAKER_03 25:47

And and I I know you do not do things for money, uh, you do not do things for recognition. So I'm gonna highlight one more thing about you, but this is is really more so to be an example for somebody who might be where you were when you heard those words going down Nealand Avenue, and your daughter looked up and said, Daddy, there's your home. I I I want individuals who have maybe been struggling, maybe been second guessing, am I doing what I want to do? Think about where we've taken you in this conversation. You started with somebody who loved uh basketball so much so that went on an improbable run, goes and plays collegiate basketball, goes becomes a collegiate coach, then transitions to be being a very, very, very highly uh successful financial advisor and leader in financial services. And now he still gets to coach. Now the University of Tennessee has him on TV and doing radio. All the things he's always loved are still a part of his life. So just because you maybe close the door on being a coach doesn't mean you're closing the door on the things that you love, and God has an amazing way of opening all of the doors for you to be able to live a life that includes everything. Everything that you love.

unknown 27:16

I'm a dead boy, and don't bad don't I'm a bad boy, and don't