Speaker 1: 0:00

When I observed you, you were there in St Louis for any and every opportunity. You weren't there to be entertained by an event. You were there to get better. You were there to build relationships. You were there to meet people. You were there to get as much out of that event as you could, which is why I could see that in your eyes, even when we were doing the morning workouts, there was something intentional about you being there.

Speaker 2: 0:24

If you're on a one-day, you got to do everything you can. You got to get the things done that you need to get done and you got to move yourself forward. And he would always say at the end of the day, would you be? Would you be hired again? Would they extend your?

Speaker 1: 0:41

contract. Welcome back to another episode of the Burn. I am Ben Newman and you know how we do this. Every single week we're going to bring you a story of an athlete, an entertainer, a celebrity, somebody from the business world who has shown us the example that why and purpose is not enough. It's about that underlying burn that ignites your why and purpose and causes you to show up on the days you don't feel like it, and especially after you win. What an amazing story we are going to share with each and every single one of you.

Speaker 1: 1:26

I am a big believer that there are no coincidences and oftentimes people make a decision that impacts future decisions, but it's that original yes or decision that's the catalyst for all of it. Yes or decision that's the catalyst for all of it. Matthew Wilson made a decision to attend our St Louis Summit last year. In attending that St Louis Summit and he did share with me shortly thereafter that he'd read books and things and known of our work he made a choice to come to the St Louis Summit not knowing. I didn't know, he didn't know that I would pay attention to who he was, how he attacked the workout, how he carried himself, how he showed up at that event. Keep in mind there's a couple hundred people at this event, but I pay attention to the details and one of the things that's happened in our business is we work with the individuals that we want to work with these days and it just so happened that we had a spot available in our standard elite mastermind group and, as a result of Matthew Wilson saying I want to go to that St Louis summit, I had the opportunity to observe, I had the opportunity to watch the attack, I had the opportunity to learn about his amazing story and who he was. He accepted that invitation to become part of our standard elite mastermind group, become part of our Standard Elite Mastermind group and I have continued to learn the amazing story of Matthew Wilson.

Speaker 1: 3:09

And now you all have the opportunity to go deep into the darkness, as oftentimes you've heard me allude to more recently with Matthew, to better understand our connection, his deep-rooted burn, why his real estate firm in New York City is one of the fastest growing, most attractive brands in all of real estate in New York City. This is a story you better listen to the details. This is a story that's going to get raw. This is a story that's going to get real. This is a story that's going to be iron sharpens iron, which is what I appreciate about the relationship that we have together. Matthew Wilson, welcome to the Burn.

Speaker 2: 3:51

Thank you so much, brother, and you know it's every time I talk to you. I appreciate that introduction and maybe it's the words you said, maybe it's the inflection in your voice, but every time you talk I want to run through a wall. So that's how I feel after the introduction. But thank you, I appreciate you and thank you for having me.

Speaker 1: 4:11

Well, let's get right down to it. And you know and it's just great to have you here with us you know how much our relationship means to me. I've expressed that to you privately. It's great to be able to share that publicly. But I want to get right down to it, because your story is very powerful and there's so much synergy that we have as a result of pain that we experienced in childhood. Tell us what it was like for you growing up in New Hampshire and how important that burn even though I didn't call it the burn when I was young and you didn't call it the burn when you were young similar ages when we found our burns Tell us all about that childhood and how important the burn has been for you.

Speaker 2: 4:53

Yeah, I had a very chaotic childhood. Both of my parents were alcoholics, my dad was abusive, he also struggled with drugs and my mom was an alcoholic my whole life and it created an environment that was very chaotic and confusing, you know. So as a young boy I would cry myself to sleep every night. I was just kind of trying to cope with the environment that I was in, of trying to cope with the environment that I was in, and it was difficult and I went through, you know, as a teenager, all the different emotions just angry, just angry at the world, then very sad at the world, then super confused by, you know, why my friend's home life was different, or why my friends had things and I didn't. And it was just the word I like to use is chaotic, and that was kind of all I knew until I went off to college and when you went to college and even growing up.

Speaker 1: 6:04

Another one of the synergies that we had was basketball. Basketball and athletics became an outlet for you, to where you felt accepted and you felt loved when you experienced so much pain. How important was hoops for you? How important was being part of a team? How meaningful was that for you? So it important was being part of a team. How meaningful was that for you.

Speaker 2: 6:24

So it was extremely meaningful. I say that basketball saved my life. When I was in second grade, matt Grimes asked me if I wanted to come and try out for the basketball team with him. Till that point in my life I didn't even know what a basketball was. So we go to tryouts, and I was from a little small town in New Hampshire where nobody was really that good at basketball, so I was. I ended up making the team.

Speaker 2: 6:48

And you're right to your point is that was one of the first times in my life I felt wanted and accepted on the basketball team. So I practiced all the time I after school I'd be shooting hoops, I'd be playing with friends, just to keep trying to get better, because I knew if I got better I'd be wanted on the team. And so I played basketball my whole life and I almost dropped out of high school. All my siblings dropped out of high school. I was in ninth grade failing math class, and I almost dropped out. And I said you know what, if I want to keep playing basketball, I at least have to get good enough grades to be on the team. And so I decided to. You know, start trying in school, end up getting decent grades, keep playing, end up graduating high school and wanted to go play basketball in college and I went to Southern New Hampshire University, tried to walk on for the team there. I didn't make the team but I did meet a really good friend, lifelong friend of mine, chris Brickley, and to that point I was just kind of following basketball. And so I meet Chris. He goes why don't you? You're not going to play for the team, but why don't you be a student manager? It's like a student coach. I said it's not a bad idea. So I do that at Southern New Hampshire University.

Speaker 2: 8:12

Well, chris transfers from Southern New Hampshire University and goes to University of Louisville. He calls me half a semester later and he said oh, this is amazing. I'm playing for Rick Pitino. There's 30,000 kids going to school here. You know at Southern New Hampshire diversity back then I think there was 4,000. Then Chris called me and said you know what I'm going? So I transferred to the University of Louisville. I work as a student manager there for Rick Pitino and I just kind of kept following basketball and Steve Masiello was an assistant coach there. He gets a job at Manhattan College and I follow him up here and I start working for Manhattan College in the Bronx. That's how I got to New York City and you know, yeah, it was the love for basketball. It saved my life. I would have definitely not graduated high school like the rest of my siblings had it not been for basketball, and it was kind of it was a, it was a blessing, it was God sent, for sure.

Speaker 1: 9:20

And we're not going to go there, but I know we could probably do an extra four burn episodes just on Rick Pitino and everything that you learned at University of Louisville. I mean, you know you talk about an ability to win wherever you go. You know Pitino always had that innate ability, no matter, you know what people like to say. You know oftentimes great coaches, people always have something to say, and, uh, but I can't even imagine. So I'm just going to ask you to maybe share one thing. Um, but I can't imagine. I know a lot of the lessons that you shared with me, but what do you think is the most significant lesson? Cause we can't just brush over the fact that you work for Rick Pitino.

Speaker 1: 10:00

This is one of the greatest coaches in the history of college basketball.

Speaker 2: 10:04

You know you're right. We could go on for days with the lessons that Rick Pitino taught me. You know my first. So I was a student manager and then and then coach P hired me as a video guy, slash his personal driver for the year. So I spent a lot of time with him. The one thing I'll say that he taught me me and he has a book about this and it's called the one day contract and essentially the meaning is you're owed nothing. When you wake up, you are owed nothing. You got to go get it, and he instilled this in his teams and he instilled it in me, and it's something that I still think about. Think about today.

Speaker 1: 10:41

I absolutely love that. You know, I always say one day at a time, but the one, one day contract is so powerful and you know. The other thing is that that's something that you just observation and now creating alignment, which we're going to talk about. When I observed you, you were there in St Louis for any and every opportunity. You weren't there to be entertained by an event. You were there to get better. You were there in St Louis for any and every opportunity. You weren't there to be entertained by an event. You were there to get better. You were there to build relationships. You were there to meet people. You were there to get as much out of that event as you could, which is why I could see that in your eyes, even when we were doing the morning workouts, there was something intentional about you being there.

Speaker 1: 11:20

And when I think of one-day contracts and I want to tie this together it makes me think of the number of people who sign up to do something but then don't even approach that opportunity with the right awareness or intentional focus to actually capture the opportunity. So that's where I think one day contract is almost like every day is an interview, no matter where you go. It's an interview. No matter where you go, there's a potential opportunity that you may not even know is an opportunity. How important has that become in terms of your mindset when you think of that one day contract?

Speaker 2: 11:55

It's super important and it's super powerful. You know, if you're on a one day contract, you got to do everything you can. You got to get the things done, that you need to get done and you got to move yourself forward. And he would always say, at the end of the day, would you be hired again, would they extend your contract? And it's just a great way to think about it. I only compare myself to me yesterday just trying to get a little bit better than Matthew Wilson yesterday, and that's's that's where that one day contract is so powerful. If you think about it like that, say, oh, like I say, I'm going to do all these things today, I do them, I move forward.

Speaker 1: 12:32

okay, I'll get another, I'm getting another contract well, let's, let's go back to childhood before we open up this door. Of the amazing things that you're doing at alignment basketball was your acceptance. It continued whether it be an amazing relationship with you know chris brickley, who's now recognized you and I could debate that too. He and drew hanlon is the two best uh trainers in all of basketball in the world today. To Coach Patino accepting you, to all these amazing relationships that basketball brought you, how tough was it and how often do you think about that burn and the pain of loneliness as a kid to now fuel you today to make sure that the right people are in your life, the right people are in your team, the right people are there to fight with you.

Speaker 2: 13:26

Yeah, it took me a long time, you know, even though basketball helped, with people wanting me to be around, it took a long time for me to accept that.

Speaker 2: 13:40

And you know, a lot of it was from the trauma of my childhood, you know, and I just I spent most of my 20s running from that.

Speaker 2: 13:49

And so, even though I was experiencing some cool things, you know, working for Rick Pitino, being best friends with Chris Brickley, watching him grow his business, I was still I was still very lost. I was still very lost and I felt that I didn't really have an identity and I was kind of just doing the things that society tells you you should do. And I was just doing a lot of things that other people wanted me to do, because I thought if I did what other people wanted, I would be accepted. If you like the color blue, I would say I like the color blue, because if you like it and if I, if I say I like it, then you'll accept me. And then and I did that for a long time but I realized that I was miserable and I had to start doing some inner work on myself and that brought me back to me as a child and that went on and the, the, the struggle.

Speaker 2: 14:48

You know that I went through. So it's very important for me to connect with that little boy every day and it keeps me grounded, it keeps me inspired, it keeps me very inspired and it keeps me moving forward.

Speaker 1: 15:11

I love that connection and alignment that you and I both have to having to connect to that strong little boy that lies inside of us. You know a lot of people. They wouldn't want to talk about those things, rather than understanding that darkness or pain is actually where the two of us have found strength. That is actually the superpower, strength that causes you to lead, strength that causes you to push, strength that causes you to challenge, and strength that has now led you to being an amazing leader of alignment, which is the real estate brokerage firm that you formed in New York.

Speaker 1: 15:47

And when I think about the amazing things that you've done, some of the things that stand out to me are the pillars of alignment that you're clear on and bringing in the right people to the organization. Having people that are like-minded, going and working out with your teams, because being physical, you know, causes you to show up with a different level of confidence to the parties with private chefs that you bring in because you want to create an experience. It's interesting because a lot of people choose a word in order to name their company because they just think it sounds good, whereas I think there's a uniqueness to the alignment that you have with finding the right people, doing things the right way, doing it with integrity, to build a brand that is now recognized in New York as being a disruptor in terms of what's going on in real estate. So tell us a little bit about the brand, tell us a little bit more about your work and why that alignment word was so important to really be the word that leads all of you.

Speaker 2: 16:52

Yeah, it's a great question and it actually I believe that alignment was born when I was a young boy, through the struggle that I went through and you know, I had a chaotic childhood when, when I was 18, my mother tried to commit suicide for the second time in her life, and I spent the next all of my 20s probably the next 12 years just running from myself and running from my problems. But the problem with that is, everywhere you go, there you are, so my problems just keep following me around and they would pop up. And the funny thing about problems maybe not so funny is they always pop up at the most inopportune times. I got to a place, a very dark place. I was working at a building here in New York City and I was walking, I'd be going to work, thinking about reasons not to go to the roof and jump off, and In that moment I heard something that helped change my mind and change my mindset, and it goes to something to the effect of sometimes, when you're in a dark place, you think that you've been buried, but actually you've been planted. And I thought about that a lot and I said, well, I'm in a really dark place, but the reality was. I knew why I was there. I knew the bad decisions that I was making. I knew that I was pushing off dealing with the shit from my past.

Speaker 2: 18:15

And I think that we all know to a certain extent the things you need to do to better your life. And so I started. Just with my physical health. I said, if I can, just to start to get that going in the right direction, I can. Everything else will follow.

Speaker 2: 18:32

And alignment was born out of me not doing the things to be in alignment. And so an alignment is mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally right. When all of those areas of your life are in alignment, things become much easier. You know, life is still hard, but it's my belief that there's a reason. People succeed and don't succeed, like we all. We could all tell somebody how to get a six pack. Why do some people have it and some people don't?

Speaker 2: 19:05

I believe that if you want something and you can't figure out how to get there, something's out of alignment. Maybe it's mentally, maybe it's physically, maybe it's spiritually, maybe it's emotionally. But if you can get yourself to make positive decisions in all areas of your life, you'll be in alignment. So that's the deep rooted meaning of alignment for me and now my partner Sunani. She's from Shanghai, I'm a white boy from New Hampshire. We couldn't be more opposite. We, we align different cultures. She's female, I'm male. We align different sexes. So there's, we align our buyers and sellers. So the word alignment has a lot of meanings to us. But the deep rooted meaning for me in my life is when you're in alignment, you can, it's much easier to go out and do the things you know you need to do to get the success that you want.

Speaker 1: 19:52

And I think that's what's so attractive about the brand that you've built, from the relationship with Sunani to now, things that are happening in the Indian market and in the Greek market, and just this sense of alignment has become attractive, you know. So here, you know, it was almost like you were running from who you were and now stepping in and finding this alignment, by choosing to be planted rather than buried, has caused you to become attractive in terms of brand and how you do things, which has created some amazing results. You know, one of the things I think is so incredible is the relationships that you're willing to build in order to create opportunity, and we won't get specific about certain clients, but there's relationships that you built with some of the powerhouse real estate brokerage firms in all of New York City the titans for you to have opportunity. That has now become consistent opportunity, which is causing you to have opportunity. That has now become consistent opportunity, which is causing you to have this incredible growth.

Speaker 1: 20:48

And I think, for everybody listening, that takes courage right. That takes courage to choose to plant yourself. That takes courage to choose to surround yourself with the right people. That takes courage to show up and do the work to keep earning these one day contracts with yourself. Tell us about the vision that you see for alignment, knowing that you're willing to do the little things that most people are unwilling to do.

Speaker 2: 21:14

Well, I think that there is no ceiling on the growth of alignment and I think that it's true for every individual myself and every individual out there when you accept the journey to just improving, there is no limit because we continue to get better off of yesterday and I think when you have that mindset, it's very different than most of the market. You know most of the market. The thing I struggle with the most here at Alima is two things when things are not going well with some of the agents or even the company as a whole, like how do we get, how do we dig out of that right. And the other hardest part is when things are going very well and how do we keep it going? And all it comes down to is just the daily habits of mastering the monotonous. And it's.

Speaker 2: 22:12

It sounds simple, but it's very difficult. It's very difficult because we're all emotional, we're all, we're all human beings and that's why I always bring it back to alignment, because if we can stay in this aligned state mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally it's much easier to master the monotonous. And if we continue to do that over time, it's like a dripping faucet. No one will be able to beat us If you just continue to work, master the monotonous, keep moving forward, keep the momentum. Look, we're a small company right now there's many bigger companies out there, but we're going to keep coming. We're going to keep mastering and monotonous. So you might be ahead of us today, but if you slip up tomorrow we're going to get a little bit, we're going to gain a little bit of traction on you. You slip up, you know, next week we're just going to keep coming. Simple, right, but very hard, very hard if you're not connected to your burn.

Speaker 1: 23:10

I'm going to finish with a question that you are not going to expect, that I love about how you show up in life, john Wooden. Going back to our love for basketball, john Wooden arguably the greatest coach to maybe ever coach anything certainly the game of basketball used to say that you cannot have a great day until you've done something for somebody else with no expectation of anything in return. You know, you and I are both driven by a lot of that little boy that lies inside of us, that had to go through so much pain in the darkness to find our true selves and strength, had to go through so much pain in the darkness to find our true selves and strength. You've made a conscious choice to want to give back to kids and to students and to speak when you can and to be able to go and serve.

Speaker 1: 24:10

One of my favorite memories is that picture of you in one of a very fancy one, of a kind handmade suit, standing in front of students in an underprivileged community there in New York City, speaking to those kids. And every time I think of that picture, I think of your big purpose. And you talk about alignment, not just in the areas that everybody sees, but that's something most people don't see and that's your willingness to go back to speak to that little boy in that room and that little girl in that room. That was once you knowing that they may have their struggles and they may have their pain that's going on in their home that those teachers may never see. Why is providing that hope to kids and speaking and going back? Why has that become so important for you at this point in your life when you could easily say, look, I'm growing my firm, one day I'll go back and give back and speak? Why do you continue to do things like that? I figured that's just a powerful way to finish that most people probably wouldn't have expected.

Speaker 2: 25:06

Yeah, it's a great question and I, you're right, I didn't expect it, you know. I think that there's only three things that fulfill us in life. This is something I thought about a lot. I think your personal journey fulfills you. I think that finding a partner and sharing this life with somebody, and and having a family, maybe have some kids there's a lot of fulfillment in that. And then the third thing, I think, is giving back to people. So there's that, you know, but every time I speak to kids or even meet a kid, especially if I speak in an underprivileged area, like when we were down in Mexico, that was me, you know.

Speaker 2: 25:42

I was in that classroom and there were times in my life where somebody, an adult, had a positive impact on me. There was a guy that lived down the end of the street that would let me paint for him in the summer, a guy by the name of Kimo, just a God-sent beautiful guy, and he had a positive impact on me and I feel that I could do that for others. I could find myself as a seven or eight year old boy and help them, and that's my whole thing. I just wanna be a lighthouse to my younger self. I just wanna be a good example to my younger self.

Speaker 2: 26:24

I just wanna keep improving, so that way, if I come across the kid who was in a similar situation as me when I was a young boy, maybe I have that positive effect on him and, and selfishly, it gives me a lot of fulfillment. You know, when I go and speak in front of a front of a class of even just young kids, and especially if they're underprivileged, it gives me a lot of fulfillment, and so that's why I do it. And I think that you know a good friend of mine, very successful guy, guy by the name of Cliff Lerner. He says you know, people always wait till they make it to give back or to tell their story, when actually the most impact happens on your way. And yeah, so that's why I do it, brother.

Speaker 1: 27:05

I love you, I appreciate you. How you show up in this world is needed, and the purpose and the clarity in which you show up with this powerhouse firm that you are building is a blessing to be a part of, and what an amazing thing for us to be able to share this with everybody on the burn.

Speaker 2: 27:30

And I appreciate you taking the time to do this. Thank you, man. And you're a brother to me. You know how I feel about you and I wouldn't be where I am, alignment, wouldn't be where I am if you didn't help me figure out and connect to my burn. So thank you so much.

Speaker 1: 27:43

Well, the best part is and we know this we are just getting started.

Speaker 1: 27:47

That's the beginning and we talk about it all the time, which would be a sequel, but you know, we're both so connected to the burn and the process and the constant almost starvation for what our very best looks like that it really will be a never finished mindset together for a long, long time, and I appreciate you.

Speaker 1: 28:08

We're going to make sure in the call notes, please, everybody. We're going to give you all the ways to stay connected with Matthew. One of the things that you'll find is that there's so many lessons to be learned in following how he goes about his business. He's just an all-star on social media which, even if you're not in the real estate business, you'll just find joy in following and hearing the stories and the messages and how intentional he is and how he does things. So we're going to make it super easy for everybody to stay connected with Matthew and make sure that you share this episode with somebody who maybe has that little boy or that little girl inside of them that needs to hear Matthew's story, because it's our stories and our burn that give us the ability to live our biggest and best and most impactful lives. Matthew, thanks again for coming on the Burn.

Speaker 2: 28:59

Thank you, brother.

Speaker 1: 29:00

To each and every single one of you remember. It's that connection to the Burn, it's that underlying fire that ignites why and purpose, that causes you to show up on the days you don't feel like it, and especially after you win like, subscribe and make sure you come back and join us next week. This has been the burn. Outro Music.